The full story is never as tidy as the one that starts with “Obviously . . .”
Take the hard feelings away, and this is the right thing to do. Put the feelings back and it hurts like hell, but the right thing to do hasn’t changed.
Do yourself proud, in whatever shape that takes.
Fear and defensiveness, the architects of so many of our lowest moments.
Relationships are complicated, but happiness in a relationship isn’t: It’s just wanting exactly what you have. Wanting something else is dispiriting.
Get out of the conceptual rut that a good life looks one way and a disappointing one looks another.
Worldview-crash is usually comprehensive.
When people bypass simple solutions to write to someone like me, that tends to mean there’s an ulterior motive on board.
Competitive people are most annoying to other competitive people.
I’d never thought about this before:
Here’s something to consider: Not everyone is comfortable with the abundance of noise, speech, color, smell, touch — especially touch — involved with small children. They’re in your lap, your arms, they’re tugging your hands, your shirt, your hair. Again, this affects men and women, introverts especially, older more than younger, and leads both men and women to withdraw (though women still tend to be the parent in the thick of it).
A willingness to hear unwelcome truths is the unhappy person’s best friend.
Behavior is easier to change than expectations are. […] Telling your enthusiasm and daydreams to sit in a closet till [the situation] proves worthy of them? That involves the hard work of identifying, and admitting, why you so badly need the validation. Repairing the source of the need is the answer here.